While doing research on integrity, I stumbled across a 104 year old essay by a John MacLaren that answered the question, "What is a Gentleman?" It's wonderfully written, so click on the link if you're interested.
Mr. MacLaren's essay prompted me to put on this public site the reason why I chose the title "First Gentleman." Initially, when people asked me what they should call me I said, "call me Dan," and that remains my preferred moniker. But after being asked repeatedly, I decided if a title was in order, why not call me "the first gentleman." I chose this title for a few reasons. First, other male spouses had already claimed the fun names: first hunk, first dude, and first coach. Seriously, I learned from my Irish grandmother's repeated instructions, that gentleman meant something, and most important it meant that you showed respect to ladies, and a special fidelity to your lady. I am proud and humbled to serve my wife. As "first lady" connotes a respect for her husband and her governor, it seems like "first gentleman" is an appropriate mirror image that conveys respect to the leader of the state. Second, I chose the title with the thought that it might help to inject this word back into our vocabulary. I think all men should strive to be "gentlemen," a word, and perhaps therefore a style, that has unfortunately lost meaning in our culture. We have lost appreciation for the humility and civility that the word connotes. So, I see the title as something I try to earn every day, by showing respect to my elders, love for my wife, kindness to children. Mr. MacLaren says it so much better than I. I hope you'll read his thoughts -- more potent today than at the outset of the 20th century.
- Daniel Granholm Mulhern
- First Gentleman